Walk into 2011 with Me

2010... has been an awful awful drag and wait.

It's weird that after the burst of excitement upon getting the news, the flame died down quite a bit (maybe lots of shit to kiok? 舍不得 my friends, etc.) during the past 2 weeks.. but now that it's getting nearer and nearer, it will probably shoot up again very soon.

I'd spent the longest time ever to get a job.. been to countless interviews, spent (I dare say) 80% of my leave on them and all ended up with false hopes and major disappointment. Was asked 'how's your interview' till I also damn paiseh. Dragged myself to work everyday, worse when I have to go to Senoko from Bedok.. Tired, listless and totally unmotivated. Never felt so bad before, to the extent that I was like in a state of depression. Each time I see/hear my name in emails or whatever, I really hated my name so much. The surge of instant irritation, frustration and even anger, I can't describe. I guess you could sense some from my previous posts too...

This in turn, have affected myself a lot.. including 很多无辜的受害者 around me. A very bad thing is, I don't leave these in office.. weekends I might be better but it's like there's an an auto-mode setting on me on Sunday evenings weekly - Pre-Monday Blues. Then During, then Post. Never-ending. I get insomia all the time too, which is like adding oil to fire. My colleague congratulated me and said she welcome the old Miss Sunshine @ Somerset back. Yes, that was my old nickname... hard to believe, even for myself.

I'm sorry for affecting you in one (or many) way(s) or another, be it my whinings, complains or sian-ness via msn, emails, calls or face-to-face. They were totally uncalled for.. And thank you for all the cheer-ups and support that you've given me...

BUT!! The dreadful days are over, I promise you. I won't know what the new job entails, but at least I'm all ready and eager to face it. It's definitely gonna be more challenging and exciting, for sure. A bit of teaser.. I've gotten news that I might be sent to dxb for a convention. Already. =p

After the rain comes sunshine and rainbow. Walk with me into a happy and exciting 2011.

Finally Found.

I am typing this on 29 Nov, but can only publish it today.

After a whole bloody painful year, I can finally end my search. On 29 Nov morning when I received the call, I was in a total shock and had totally no idea how to react. It's like having a non-stop and no-need-money fireworks display in my heart and brain; It's like you've been yearning for something so badly for so long, and finally when it's placed in your hands, you don't even dare to believe and hold it. It was such a fast process too... 1st interview on 24 Nov, 2nd on 26 Nov and voila!

Next, after the fireworks finally subsided, comes the flooding of practical thoughts. A new beginning, a brand new hope. Having to leave all I have established here, all my sistas, brothers, and uncles. Wah, just typing the previous line makes me wanna tear liao.. when the day comes, I'm sure to rain buckets. See, Uncle KH just came and passed me a curry puff bought specially for me, coz he knows I like it. I'm gonna miss his naggings and noise so much.

I've worn the shoes to take the huge step out, now what lies ahead, is the path that I'm gonna go through. A crawl, a stroll, a sprint? The new environment, colleagues, boss, etc... No idea... But these are the least of my thoughts now. I am so looking forward to it.

I've finally found you!